Tag Archive | friends

Holy Land Reflections #3 – Easter: The Aftermath

Apr27

Retelling the Resurrection story on Easter Sunday.

We had a terrific family Easter celebration last weekend. After church, our kids and grandkids and several extra families gathered at our house for a delicious meal of ham and smoked brisket and all kinds of delectable goodies to go along with it. The sun came out to cheer us on in our all-ages Easter egg hunt. The grass was green, the sky was blue, and the flowers were blooming. We lazed around the rest of the day and played games and enjoyed each other’s company. It was idyllic.

Reflecting on it afterwards, it struck me, by contrast, that our Easter experience was the opposite of the first Easter, which was idyllic by no means. “Traumatic” would be a better description! Jesus’ followers had watched their Teacher and Friend be cruelly tortured and killed in one of the most horrific ways possible. Their hopes and dreams dashed. Their faith shaken. Their confidence demoralized. Now He had apparently risen from the dead … but what would be the implications of that?  I’m sure their imaginations and emotions were reeling.

Of Jesus’ disciples, I’d consider Simon Peter the poster child for Easter: The Aftermath. He had been the one so confident in Jesus’ identity and mission. “You are the Christ, the Son of the Living God!” he had once bravely (and astutely) announced (Matt. 16:16). In the Garden of Gethsemane, at Jesus’ arrest, he’d brashly lashed out and cut off the ear of the high priest’s servant to try and protect His Lord (John 18:10). Yet, his boldness dissipated after he saw Jesus dead and buried, so much so that he denied Him three times when asked if he knew Him . . . though he swore he never would (Matt. 26:75).

We visited this cave near Galilee, at the mouth of Jordan River (in foreground) was known as the “Gates of Hell” in Jesus’ time. It was at this site that Peter made his proclamation that Jesus was the Christ … and that Jesus made His own proclamation that He would build His Church and “the gates of hell would not prevail against it.” (Matt. 16)

When Doug and I were in the Holy Land a few weeks ago, I thought about this scenario— though oddly not when we were in Jerusalem visiting the Easter-related sites of Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection. I thought about it most, rather, when we were in the idyllic setting of the Sea of Galilee, on a scenic beach with the waves lapping up on shore.

The beach on the Sea of Galilee where Jesus greeted Peter with breakfast and a full catch of fish.

It was here, on this beach, in the aftermath the first Easter, that Jesus met His friends. In this idyllic setting, He met Peter face to face, not with recrimination for his faithlessness, but with restoration and a reminder of his God-given identity and purpose.

I love this story. Admittedly, Peter had been through a lot. In the aftermath of the tragedy, horror, and then astonishment of the death and resurrection of Jesus, he’d probably reached his emotional limit. He announced, “I’m going fishing!” and headed back home to Galilee. Now that I’ve been there, I can see why. Jerusalem and Galilee are about as opposite as they could be.

Jerusalem is crowded and chaotic (and would have been especially so at that time, as it would swell to about three million when Passover pilgrims spilled into it each year for sacrifices and festivities). Galilee is green, lush, quiet, and pastoral. Even today, the contrast is striking.

Peter and his friends fished all night and didn’t catch anything. In the early morning hours of the dawn, a mysterious figure called out to them from shore, “Try casting your nets on the other side of the boat!” Huh? Kind of an odd suggestion; they’d likely tried back and forth all night long! But, oh well, it couldn’t hurt, right? Surprise! Their nets came up LOADED with fish!

Peter likely remembered immediately that Jesus had said He’d meet them back in Galilee in the aftermath of His death and resurrection (Matt. 26:32). It was the Lord! Always the impetuous one, Peter jumped overboard and waded to shore, where Jesus had breakfast and a heart-to-heart talk waiting for him (John 21).

“Church of the Primacy of Peter,” the church built over the rock where Jesus served up breakfast to Peter and some of the other disciples after His Resurrection.

I’m grateful for the “aftermath” of Easter, for all of us. Like this special reunion that Jesus planned for His friends, it’s rooted in the shock and awe of the crucifixion and resurrection, but celebrated in restoration and joy because of it. Like Peter, I’ve certainly had my seasons of over-confidence, disappointment, disillusionment, and failure. How grateful I am that Jesus meets me in the aftermath of these, picks me up, dusts me off, and restores me with love and relational connection!

We enjoyed a traditional “St. Peter’s Lunch”  . . . tilapia from the Sea of Galilee. I doubt Jesus included french fries. 🙂

I love it, too, that Jesus included breakfast in this scenario. Perhaps He was mindful that good food and fellowship warm both the heart and the tummy at the same time (smile). And I love it that He picked a beautiful place that was scenic and dear to His friends’ hearts. Idyllic. What a striking picture of the message of the Resurrection—restoration, life, relationship and hope.

May we always live in the beautiful, restorative aftermath of Easter!

The “Jerusalem Cross,” this one on a door at the Garden of Gethsemane in Jerusalem.

(c) 2019 Arlyn J. Lawrence. All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Parenting Is a Team Sport

Nov15

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Last Valentine’s Day, the parents of our teenage daughter’s best friend took the two of them, and a third friend, out to a fancy restaurant. The dad gave the girls pretty rings and a pep talk about their priceless worth and the importance of loving and respecting themselves. He had contacted Doug and me earlier to ask our permission and we happily consented.  After all, he was reinforcing something we felt strongly about and we were glad for Hillary to hear it from more than just us.

Doug and I joke all the time that parenting is a “team sport”—and our team extends beyond ourselves as Mom and Dad. Some experts believe the magic number is five—that every teen needs at least five adult voices in his or her life that will reinforce positive values and a healthy self-image. For our kids, these voices have included:

  • their grandparents and other extended family members
  • family friends
  • youth group leaders/mentors
  • teachers and coaches
  • parents of some of their friends

It’s been rewarding to see the different perspectives and qualities these other “voices” have contributed, especially at times when Mom and Dad were a little less popular! They offered wisdom in diverse areas like:

  • work ethic
  • integrity
  • perseverance and self-discipline
  • relationships
  • financial management
  • spiritual life (faith, encouragement, prayer)
  • practical skills like construction, painting, cooking, and car repair
  • the value of family
  • aspirations for college and a successful career
  • modeling a lifelong marriage

Do you have the benefit of other influences in your teen’s life that will tell him the same things you would? The unique value of other adults in our teens’ lives is not just the wisdom they offer, but the fact that they are listened to. So, if our voices are temporarily devalued and our influence seems to be waning, we can recruit others to “shore us up.” Plus, sometimes other adults offer unique perspectives and insights that we as parents simply lack.

For example, when one of our kids was going through a rough patch in high school, his track coach stepped in and brought some much needed perspective, encouragement, and accountability. This coach was also our son’s AP Psychology teacher. Because of that expertise, he was able to offer him unique insights that spoke directly and objectively to his logical nature, helping him better understand himself and his reactions. It ended up being a win on a number of levels.

Guaranteed: your children will stumble here and there as they make great strides. Sometimes, they will want you there to pick them up, dust them off and set them straight again. Other times, they’ll prefer you keep your distance and let them handle it. In these instances, having those important third part voices in place will be great backup support.

If your teen is having a tough time, who in your life could become an asset for the situation? It always pays to know, and to keep them in your “hip pocket” just in case!

What do you think about the idea that “parenting is a team sport?” Who are other adults that you would consider to be on your “team?” If you need to shore this up, who are some likely candidates?

 

This post was originally posted on http://www.lifesmartblog.com and adapted from the soon-to-be-released Parenting for the Launch: Raising Teens to Succeed in the Real World (co-authored by Dennis Trittin & Arlyn Lawrence, LifeSmart Publishing).

 

Care Packages for Our College Kids

Nov2

I was delighted when my friend Angie emailed me and some other mothers of freshmen college students, and suggested we get together to make care packages for our kids.

Each mom would bring one item and a note of encouragement for each student. Angie would pick up Priority Mail boxes at the Post Office and we’d get together for coffee to put the packages together assembly-line style. What a great idea!

It was a wonderful time!  Here’s what it looked like:

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These were my contribution.  I gave the girls fancy bobby pins, note cards, and a Butter Finger, and the boys got fake eyebrows (it was the week before Halloween) and Milk Duds.

collegecare-3I put them in cute bags I found at Target, with little notes attached. On the  girls’ notes I wrote  the Scripture, “The Lord your God is with you,” (Zephaniah 3:17), and on the boys’ notes I wrote Proverbs 15:13, “A happy heart makes the face cheerful”–keep smiling!

collegecare-4We lined up the boxes and everyone dropped their items in each. Here is Jane putting in her contributions.

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It was a lot of fun!

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Susan brought fun and fuzzy socks.

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We took time to pray together for our kids and sent the boxes off with love and blessings.

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Everyone took their own boxes to put in the mail.

I hope our kids realize how blessed they are to have such a wonderful community of moms supporting them!

A Jaunt in Jane Austen Country

Jun22

Peter and Caroline have lent us their car, so today we drove to Winchester to visit our friends Tim and Pippa. We’ve known them nearly eight years now and, although we’re separated by both an ocean and a continent–and only see each other about once at year (if we’re lucky)–they are among our dearest friends. We always seem to pick up right where we left off.

We all traipsed into into town from their house, dodging raindrops, and Tim suggested we go into the Winchester Cathedral to `’have a pray`’ and get out of the rain.  A choir of school children was singing as we entered,  their lovely voices ringing through the centuries-old cathedral. We found ourselves a side chapel in which to sit and pray for one another—specifically for our kids, as we often do when we’re together. It’s such a poignant feeling to be praying in a place believers have looked for and experienced God for centuries, and so easy to feel connected to history here.

Speaking of history, this place is full of it. Jane Austen (who wrote Pride and Predjudice and is my favorite author) was buried below the cathedral. She lived most of her life in Hampshire, and died right here in Winchester. Her gravestone is set in the floor and reads:

In memory of Jane Austen, youngest daughter of the late Rev. George Austen, formerly Rector of Steventon in this county, who departed this life on the 18th of July, 1817, aged 41, after a long illness, supported by the patience and the hopes of a Christian. The benevolence of her heart, the sweetness of her temperament, the extraordinary endowments of her mind obtained the regard of all who knew her and the warmest love of her intimate connections.

Their grief is in proportion to their affections. They know their loss to be irreparable but in their deepest affliction they are comforted by a firm though humble hope that her charity, devotion, faith and purity have rendered her soul acceptable in the sight of her Redeemer.

(On past visits to Hampshire I’ve dragged Doug around to every Jane Austen memorial in the county. He’s such a good sport.)


On our way out the door we stopped and asked a posh-looking older gentleman to take our picture together. We lined up and as he raised the camera to snap the photo, he quipped in his upper crust British accent, “Think about sex!” Of course it was the last thing we expected to hear from him so we all nearly died laughing, which is why you see us all cracking up like a bunch of teenagers  🙂

A Candy House in Powdered Sugar Snow

Dec26

     

A CANDY HOUSE IN POWDERED SUGAR SNOW

Today we finally finished the gingerbread houses … our friend Katrina is the hands-down winner; look how beautifully hers turned out.  Now we can nibble it away through the rest of the 12 days of the Christmas.

Dave and Katrina are our Australian friends from England who live in California and who spend a lot of the holidays with us. Katrina is so fun and creative; she inspires me.

We all need friends who do that, don’t we?  🙂